Monsters Dark Continent – Review

War in the time of mosques and monsters. 

military fights monsters and terrorists in the middle east sci-fi action war movieSimply stated, Monsters: Dark Continent is a mess. Before sitting down to view this film I wondered why the producers decided to call the movie ‘Dark Continent.’ Two hours later while the credits rolled down my television I’m still not completely sure but I have a theory.

Monsters: Dark Continent is very different from it’s predecessor. It takes place in the same ‘universe’ as it’s predecessor, 10 years down the line, but in Dark Continent we are thrown into the Middle East as opposed to Central America and the movie is shown through the perspective of the U.S. military rather than civilians. In the film monsters have spread the the Middle East (the explanation so throw away that you could miss it if you blink) and are multiplying. So the U.S. takes it upon itself to bomb monsters wherever they are found. the only problem is the bombs kills civilians which creates more insurgents. See where this is going?

soldiers fight giant monster



Gareth Edwards, writer/director of the first film, was tied up with commitments to Godzilla and therefore couldn’t come back to direct on this one. He dodged a bullet and he’s probably thanking his lucky stars.

So whats the theory?

I think couple executives sat down early on and had a conversation that went something like this:

“Hey, did you see that Monsters movie? The one the guy wrote and directed on a shoestring.”

“Are you talking about the one with hardly any monsters?” 

“Yeah. We need a sequel.”  

“Okay, any ideas of what it would be about?”  

“Well you’re right, the first movie didn’t have enough monsters in it so we’d need to add a whole shit ton this time.” 

“So what, like the monsters are spreading around the world?”  

“Yeah…and we need army guys shooting and blowing them up.”  

“Army guys?”  

“Definately, the final scene in the first movie with the giant monster and the explosions was the best part of the film. And we had to wait through the entire movie to see it.”

“So military fighting monsters, sounds good.” 

“We can show how brutal fighting the monsters are, and we can have the writer incorporate military jargon into the script so it sounds more authentic.” 

“That’s still not a story, what should the movie be about?”  

“How about a platoon of soldiers who are in the shit, learning it’s not all fun and games?”  

“So Platoon with monsters? That’s big budget.” 

“A squad then. Or maybe a small special forces unit. But either way, they’re fighting monsters.”  

“Just monsters?”  

“Maybe…no, oh no I have it! The military isn’t just fighting monsters, they are fighting terrorists.”  

“Hmmm…doesn’t sound very original.” 

“We can make it just like all the other middle east war movies. Squad of young soldiers sign-up all gung-ho, then find out war sucks. The monsters can be an extra threat that will add some cool sci-fi elements to what is otherwise a war picture.”  

“Now that sounds interesting, but we need to get this into production soon so we don’t have a lot of time to be creative.”  

“It’s okay, we’ll hire a couple of no-name guys, guys with credits but no major commitments, and we’ll instruct them to write a dark gritty war film with lots of monsters sprinkled throughout.” 

“Sounds like a solid plan.”  

“If we’re lucky the writers will come back with something like Apocalypse Now, only with monsters.” 

“That would be awesome!”

So basically my theory is the title is a semi-ripoff of Apocalypse Now source material Heart of Darkness.

Dark Continent suffers from several major problems but the worst, and one that brought the entire movie down, is the first person narration. One member of the squad (who are all friends from the same town and join to get away from poverty, crime, and numerous cliches) provides a voice over throughout the movie, giving us his feelings, thoughts, and growing disillusionment as reality does what it does. It’s really annoying and not done very well.

Had Dark Continent simply tried to present a military perspective without all the stylistic bullshit it would have been a better film. The monsters are cool as hell and the idea that the U.S is still in the middle east and still fucking shit up works, mainly because it’s not far fetched.

Johnny Harris (Black Death, Snow White and the Huntsman) and Nicholas Pinnock (Eastenders, Fortitude)  give great performances as the veteran Sergeants. The rest of the cast are pretty forgettable, including the stereotypical Islamic terrorists.

I really wanted to like this movie and it had/has a lot going for it, but the contrived voice over and unlikeable soldiers serve to undermine the better aspects of the film.


war movie with monsters terrorists and death

So it’s a war movie with Monsters? 

Think of the monsters as a force of nature. In westerns the good guys and bad guys have to fend off a stampede on occasion.

Good date movie?

Naw. Other than the half naked hookers in the opening twenty minutes I’m not sure there is another female role of any substance in the film.  

How do the monsters look? Good CGI?

The monsters are cool as hell. They add some new monsters into the mix and show people interacting with them as they would other animals. 

So you wouldn’t recommend the movie? 

I did not like the movie, although I wanted too badly. I’m all for supporting genre flicks, especially sci-fi, but it’s not anywhere near as good as the first film and not an especially good war movie either. If you’re going to watch it wait till it’s on Netflix or Amazon Prime. 

If you’re looking for a good monster movie that captures the darker aspects of human nature/survival check out Stake Land


Monsters Dark Continent – Review

War in the time of mosques and monsters. 

military fights monsters and terrorists in the middle east sci-fi action war movieSimply stated, Monsters: Dark Continent is a mess. Before sitting down to view this film I wondered why the producers decided to call the movie ‘Dark Continent.’ Two hours later while the credits rolled down my television I’m still not completely sure but I have a theory.

Monsters: Dark Continent is very different from it’s predecessor. It takes place in the same ‘universe’ as it’s predecessor, 10 years down the line, but in Dark Continent we are thrown into the Middle East as opposed to Central America and the movie is shown through the perspective of the U.S. military rather than civilians. In the film monsters have spread the the Middle East (the explanation so throw away that you could miss it if you blink) and are multiplying. So the U.S. takes it upon itself to bomb monsters wherever they are found. the only problem is the bombs kills civilians which creates more insurgents. See where this is going?

soldiers fight giant monster



Gareth Edwards, writer/director of the first film, was tied up with commitments to Godzilla and therefore couldn’t come back to direct on this one. He dodged a bullet and he’s probably thanking his lucky stars.

So whats the theory?

I think couple executives sat down early on and had a conversation that went something like this:

“Hey, did you see that Monsters movie? The one the guy wrote and directed on a shoestring.”

“Are you talking about the one with hardly any monsters?" 

"Yeah. We need a sequel.”  

“Okay, any ideas of what it would be about?”  

“Well you’re right, the first movie didn’t have enough monsters in it so we’d need to add a whole shit ton this time." 

"So what, like the monsters are spreading around the world?”  

“Yeah…and we need army guys shooting and blowing them up.”  

“Army guys?”  

“Definately, the final scene in the first movie with the giant monster and the explosions was the best part of the film. And we had to wait through the entire movie to see it.”

“So military fighting monsters, sounds good." 

"We can show how brutal fighting the monsters are, and we can have the writer incorporate military jargon into the script so it sounds more authentic." 

"That’s still not a story, what should the movie be about?”  

“How about a platoon of soldiers who are in the shit, learning it’s not all fun and games?”  

“So Platoon with monsters? That’s big budget." 

"A squad then. Or maybe a small special forces unit. But either way, they’re fighting monsters.”  

“Just monsters?”  

“Maybe…no, oh no I have it! The military isn’t just fighting monsters, they are fighting terrorists.”  

“Hmmm…doesn’t sound very original." 

"We can make it just like all the other middle east war movies. Squad of young soldiers sign-up all gung-ho, then find out war sucks. The monsters can be an extra threat that will add some cool sci-fi elements to what is otherwise a war picture."  

"Now that sounds interesting, but we need to get this into production soon so we don’t have a lot of time to be creative.”  

“It’s okay, we’ll hire a couple of no-name guys, guys with credits but no major commitments, and we’ll instruct them to write a dark gritty war film with lots of monsters sprinkled throughout." 

"Sounds like a solid plan.”  

“If we’re lucky the writers will come back with something like Apocalypse Now, only with monsters." 

"That would be awesome!”

So basically my theory is the title is a semi-ripoff of Apocalypse Now source material Heart of Darkness.

Dark Continent suffers from several major problems but the worst, and one that brought the entire movie down, is the first person narration. One member of the squad (who are all friends from the same town and join to get away from poverty, crime, and numerous cliches) provides a voice over throughout the movie, giving us his feelings, thoughts, and growing disillusionment as reality does what it does. It’s really annoying and not done very well.

Had Dark Continent simply tried to present a military perspective without all the stylistic bullshit it would have been a better film. The monsters are cool as hell and the idea that the U.S is still in the middle east and still fucking shit up works, mainly because it’s not far fetched.

Johnny Harris (Black Death, Snow White and the Huntsman) and Nicholas Pinnock (Eastenders, Fortitude)  give great performances as the veteran Sergeants. The rest of the cast are pretty forgettable, including the stereotypical Islamic terrorists.

I really wanted to like this movie and it had/has a lot going for it, but the contrived voice over and unlikeable soldiers serve to undermine the better aspects of the film.


war movie with monsters terrorists and death

So it’s a war movie with Monsters? 

Think of the monsters as a force of nature. In westerns the good guys and bad guys have to fend off a stampede on occasion.

Good date movie?

Naw. Other than the half naked hookers in the opening twenty minutes I’m not sure there is another female role of any substance in the film.  

How do the monsters look? Good CGI?

The monsters are cool as hell. They add some new monsters into the mix and show people interacting with them as they would other animals. 

So you wouldn’t recommend the movie? 

I did not like the movie, although I wanted too badly. I’m all for supporting genre flicks, especially sci-fi, but it’s not anywhere near as good as the first film and not an especially good war movie either. If you’re going to watch it wait till it’s on Netflix or Amazon Prime. 

If you’re looking for a good monster movie that captures the darker aspects of human nature/survival check out Stake Land


Book (Novella) Review – The Grendel’s Shadow

Off World Hunter Meets the Monster of Legend

Sci-fi horror novel that retells a version of Beowulf. Raw Book Review

The way to determine if you might enjoy this novella is to ask you the following questions:

1) Did you enjoy the story of Beowulf?

2) Did you enjoy the movie The Ghost in the Darkness?

3) Are you fan of genre mashing, specifically Sci-fi and Pulp Adventure?

4) Is an entertaining story more important than complex literary talent?

If you answered yes to any of the questions above then you may be interested in checking out The Grendel’s Shadow by Andrew Mayne.

As with previous novels we’ve reviews, this book was stumbled upon by chance and purchased based on the sale price of $0.99. Its a novella at 126 pages long, but to our surprise we were treated to a well written adventure story that kept us entertained from beginning to end.

The story follows a professional hunter who is hired by the government of a colonized planet to rid them of a wild beast that is attacking and killing families along an undomesticated frontier region.

Sounds like science fiction right? Yes, but only for the initial worldbuilding in which the story is set. What Andrew Mayne does well is take a 1920s style pulp adventure story, one that could easily be set around the turn of the century (late 1800s) and place it in a far future.

The story hits the ground running and never lets up. It’s a short read but it doesn’t disappoint.

Is it just a new version of Beowulf?

No. We asked the Beowulf question because this novel is certainly inspired by Beowulf, but it’s unique enough to be a good read.

I’m not a fan of guns and violent stories, will I like this?

We think so. It’s almost a period piece. Almost.

Where can I get it?

We bought it on Kindle.

Book (Novella) Review – The Grendel’s Shadow

Off World Hunter Meets the Monster of Legend

Sci-fi horror novel that retells a version of Beowulf. Raw Book Review

The way to determine if you might enjoy this novella is to ask you the following questions:

1) Did you enjoy the story of Beowulf?

2) Did you enjoy the movie The Ghost in the Darkness?

3) Are you fan of genre mashing, specifically Sci-fi and Pulp Adventure?

4) Is an entertaining story more important than complex literary talent?

If you answered yes to any of the questions above then you may be interested in checking out The Grendel’s Shadow by Andrew Mayne.

As with previous novels we’ve reviews, this book was stumbled upon by chance and purchased based on the sale price of $0.99. Its a novella at 126 pages long, but to our surprise we were treated to a well written adventure story that kept us entertained from beginning to end.

The story follows a professional hunter who is hired by the government of a colonized planet to rid them of a wild beast that is attacking and killing families along an undomesticated frontier region.

Sounds like science fiction right? Yes, but only for the initial worldbuilding in which the story is set. What Andrew Mayne does well is take a 1920s style pulp adventure story, one that could easily be set around the turn of the century (late 1800s) and place it in a far future.

The story hits the ground running and never lets up. It’s a short read but it doesn’t disappoint.

Is it just a new version of Beowulf?

No. We asked the Beowulf question because this novel is certainly inspired by Beowulf, but it’s unique enough to be a good read.

I’m not a fan of guns and violent stories, will I like this?

We think so. It’s almost a period piece. Almost.

Where can I get it?

We bought it on Kindle.

Movie Review (Sort of) – Guardians of the Galaxy

Yet another review of Guardians of the Galaxy?


Naw. There are a million and one reviews out there already and all but four of them say the same thing – Guardians is fantastic. An interstellar thrill ride that will leave you wanting more of Star Lord, Rocket, Drax, the deadly beautiful Gamora, and the giving tree Groot.


This could be another carbon copy review but it isn’t. Full disclosure, we are fans of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Huge fans. The few trip-ups aside (Iron Man 2 comes to mind) Marvel has created the most amazing series of films, and TV show, ever in the history of the history of storytelling. Seriously, Sheherezad has got nothing on Kevin Feige and she knows it.


So all this post is going to say is – GO SEE THE MOVIE.


You don’t need to be a fan of the MCU, or a comic book geek, or a sci-fi nerd to enjoy this film. James Gunn’s screenplay is so well written it will keep you laughing from beginning to end. The chemistry between the actors is so palpable we wouldn’t be surprised if all of them turn up pregnant in the next few weeks with each others love children.


Finally, the two CGI characters are the best part of the movie. Rocket is a complete fabrication, created in a computer, but he has a soul and an identity and a personality that is as infectious as herpes. Groot, also a fully CGI character is the most interesting and complex personality seen in a film in…possibly forever. If you are not completely in love with him by the end of the film you are not human.


Stop reading now and go see the film. You won’t be disappointed.


P.S. – To everyone bitching and complaining about the stinger at the end of the credits, calm the blank-blank-blankety-blank down. The stinger is brilliant and fun and completely unexpected. If you didn’t get it then read a freakin book you illiterate bastard. Or google it, either way.

Have fun!




Fan made posters courtesy of XombieDirge. Check them all out, they are da shizzle.

Movie Review (Sort of) – Guardians of the Galaxy

Yet another review of Guardians of the Galaxy?


Naw. There are a million and one reviews out there already and all but four of them say the same thing – Guardians is fantastic. An interstellar thrill ride that will leave you wanting more of Star Lord, Rocket, Drax, the deadly beautiful Gamora, and the giving tree Groot.


This could be another carbon copy review but it isn’t. Full disclosure, we are fans of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Huge fans. The few trip-ups aside (Iron Man 2 comes to mind) Marvel has created the most amazing series of films, and TV show, ever in the history of the history of storytelling. Seriously, Sheherezad has got nothing on Kevin Feige and she knows it.


So all this post is going to say is – GO SEE THE MOVIE.


You don’t need to be a fan of the MCU, or a comic book geek, or a sci-fi nerd to enjoy this film. James Gunn’s screenplay is so well written it will keep you laughing from beginning to end. The chemistry between the actors is so palpable we wouldn’t be surprised if all of them turn up pregnant in the next few weeks with each others love children.


Finally, the two CGI characters are the best part of the movie. Rocket is a complete fabrication, created in a computer, but he has a soul and an identity and a personality that is as infectious as herpes. Groot, also a fully CGI character is the most interesting and complex personality seen in a film in…possibly forever. If you are not completely in love with him by the end of the film you are not human.


Stop reading now and go see the film. You won’t be disappointed.


P.S. – To everyone bitching and complaining about the stinger at the end of the credits, calm the blank-blank-blankety-blank down. The stinger is brilliant and fun and completely unexpected. If you didn’t get it then read a freakin book you illiterate bastard. Or google it, either way.

Have fun!




Fan made posters courtesy of XombieDirge. Check them all out, they are da shizzle.